I’m going to start with a recent pair of conversations in my life, and use that as a jumping off point to talk about who gets to define what abuse is, and who gets to set boundaries. People in my local community may well recognise the people involved from their behaviour, and while backlash due to that bothers me, it bothers me more that the abusive behaviour is tolerated.
Category Archives: personal
I did laundry today.
I can appreciate that this seems like a minor thing. ‘Seriously, Brian? Posting about doing laundry? Ffs…..’
My anxiety has been pretty bad the last couple of weeks. The threat of job loss hanging over my head, alongside dealing with incompetent and unprofessional HR staff (I know, I know, ‘HR staff’ would have been sufficient…..), plus some kind of low-level fever that I’ve had for about a week now……. It’s all pretty difficult. I’m fortunate to have good friends.
‘Doing laundry’ takes me roughly 2 hours. I don’t own a washing machine or dryer, and the nearest coin laundry is 10-15min away, depending on how long I have to wait for a bus. I need to sit there while it runs. So I need to find a day where I can set aside 2hrs of basically doing nothing (there’s insufficient space to do the marking that I’ve committed to doing), and I need to spend some time getting physical cash (because why the fuck would I carry cash when debit is ubiquitous?). For everyone else, this is a bit of a pain in the ass. For someone with anxiety, where every step in this process requires a chunk of additional effort: This. Fucking. Sucks.
[Here’s a visual aid. Imagine, though, that this is required for *every* task. Like going to the ATM to get money. Get clothes into a bag for bringing to the laundry place. Actually going to the laundry place.]
It’s been [a socially unacceptable amount of time] since I did laundry. Y’know that scene in Ghostbusters 2, where Weaver is going to stay over at Murray’s apartment, and she discovers all his unwashed clothes, and he’s like ‘no, no, they don’t smell bad, they’re still good’, and it’s hilarious? It’s not so hilarious when you’re living it. Especially when hygiene is particularly important to you. I mentioned having good friends: if they noticed my situation, they didn’t comment. And I appreciate that.
My local laundry place does a drop-off service. I’m thinking of doing that just to take the edge off my anxiety: I’ll only have to set aside 20-30min twice in a week, about twice a month (2 round trips each time, drop off then pick up), and I won’t need to worry about change. It’ll cost my about $17 a pop, instead of $4, but it might be worth it to ensure that the laundry gets done. (I’ve looked into pickup services: they don’t charge for the pickup, but they charge 2-3 times what my local place charges, and their minimum is often $30-$50)
Anywho. I did laundry today.
I’ve had a bit of writer’s block recently, so I thought I’d try writing on a lighter topic: Blizzard’s Heroes of the Storm (HotS).
I’ve been playing this game for several months now (just under 1000 games played so far), and I enjoy it a lot. Especially since Blizzard instituted some penalties for trolls, my ingame experience has improved dramatically.
But one thing about the game bugs me: the obsession many players have with “the meta”.
I’m an immigrant to this city, though I’m legally a citizen. I moved here in May 2006, and I knew precisely one person prior to my arrival (my brother, Christopher). I moved here from Ireland, a country known for gregarious socialising. In the years since moving here, I’ve encountered a wide variety of people, have a large number of acquaintances, and a couple of circles of friends. Occasionally, I hear someone complain that “Vancouver is a cold city” or “it’s difficult to meet people here”.
To be frank, I can’t see that as anything other than bullshit.
I will be presenting one half of a discussion on Free Will tomorrow evening (in Vancouver, BC, for non-local readers). I (and the other presenter) will be giving a short 15-min introduction to the topic, and then everyone will be breaking up into smaller discussion groups.
If you’re interested in having positive (I hope) discussions with people of differing viewpoints, this could be worth a look. It’s not free, but it’s pretty low-cost. None of the funds from this go to me (disclaimer: I’ve been promised a beer, so I’m getting something out of it), nor do I know how the payments breakdown if that’s a concern.
Could be worth a look. Details (and registration) are through Eventbrite. (And no, I will not be endorsing Harris’s position on this)
I’ve recently been thinking about relearning to play the piano, so I’ll be blogging about that a bit. If you have no interest in that, the posts in this series (they’ll have a ‘piano’ tag up top) are easily skipped.
Perhaps he has only glimpsed her… On the street. On the bus.
Perhaps he knew her in a country far far away.
Perhaps they frequently share a train carriage. Or he has seen her profile on a dating site. And he read it, and drank it in. The details that were not present were filled in, unwarranted, unsupported. Yet loneliness is given control far too easily.
A short headsup: it’s been brought to my attention that a person out there is pretending to be me. They’re pointing at [my posts on The Crommunist Manifesto] and claiming that they are Brian Lynchehaun, and including the above photo in their email correspondence.
Putting aside the (clearly insane) notion that being this particular Brian Lynchehaun improves your odds with the women (I have not yet been informed that they are hitting on men), should you receive an email from someone purporting to be me, I’d encourage you to click on the twitter link that follows all of my posts in order to verify that the person contacting you is The Real Brian Lynchehauntm.
Alternatively, I can easily be found on Facebook and G+.
And now back to your regularly scheduled posts…
[This was originally posted on The Crommunist Manifesto]
I am irate. Look, I realise that I am in a position of privilege, and I realise that I’m not angry about this all the time because I’m male and that this is something that I have the privilege of simply not-concerning-myself-about for the vast bulk of my life.
I rationalise this as that I pay attention only insofar as harm is brought to my attention. And Ireland has ever-so-slowly been moving towards legalising abortion since 1992. Oh, that’s right, you didn’t know that abortion was illegal in Ireland. My bad. Did you know that it was actually illegal for doctors to tell patients about their abortion options in other countries? And that it was illegal for people to travel to another country for an abortion? No? Well, anyway, we were focused on my privilege, so let’s keep on topic.